Are You Writing This All Down Somewhere?

This is Caden.  He's holding one of the zucchini's (one of the 1.5 million zucchini's) that gew from my 4 zucchini plants this year.  I think even a monkey could grow zucchini and eat well.  Caden is our most "verbal" child.  Being the youngest of three brothers, hanging out with me all day, or just having a strange early grasp of the english language could be any of a number of reasons.  Regardless, his brain still functions and reasons like he's 2, he just occasionally blurts out the most adult sounding responses and ideas.

I was relating a "Cadenism" story to one of my friends the other day and she said, "seriously, Cort, are you writing this all down somewhere?"  Not really.  I write down alot about my kids, but sometimes things are so random to me I don't really think to write them down.  So, here you go friend, and maybe Caden WILL one day appreciate me posting this for the world (okay, the 4 people that follow my blog) to read.

In case you haven't heard, I'm pregnant.  This news may not have reached the two individuals that live in a cave on the deserted island yet to be discovered.  What you may not have heard is that Caden is also pregnant ... yes, he's pregnant.  This pregnancy has not been "stellar".  Between my old uterus, overly active clotting blood, daily regiments of puking, and general complete bitchiness, Caden has been by my side.  When I'm over the toilet praying to God that there cannot possibly be another day of puking in my future, Caden is there, rubbing my head, and saying, "don't worry Mommy, I go get u a towel, k?"  I can't even get that sort of sympathy from Jon!

Caden is there at the doctor's appointments, sitting on the bed with me, holding my hand, and watching the screen looking at the "monster" (what he calls the ultrasound images of his baby brother) telling me,. "it's okay momm, the doctor will make you feel better, he get you some medicine okay?"  And during the two times a day that I have to "shoot up" my blood thinner inkections, Caden seems to instinctively know when this will happen and he joins me in the bathroom to say, "okay, u takin' ur shot?  It's okay mommy, u be okay."  Jon has to leave the room because he can't handle watching me inject myself, Caden doesn't even flinch.  I think Caden might be a little more help in the delivery room and I might have to retire Jon for this delivery.

I suppose that it was inevitable that Caden would eventually catch this whole pregnancy "disease".  A couple of months ago he casually mentioned "his baby" and I said, "oh yeah, your brother in Mommy's tummy?" to which he responded, "NO MOMMY!  MYYYYY baby!" and then he lifted his shirt up and pointed at his stomache.  Caden was pregnant.  I had two choices at that moment.  Since he's my third child and I have become rather laxidazical in my parenting compared to my first child that was potty trained at gun point and wore matching sweater vests 90% of his life, I took the choice to accept and congratulate him.

Caden has now been pregnant 4 months, 2 months less than me.  He begins most of his days telling me that his baby wants to eat this or that for breakfast.  When he gets cocoa, he grins and says, "this is deeeeeelicious, my baby lubs it!"  This love his baby has for certain foods is not limited to cocoa.  The baby also apparently loves french fries, hates vegetables, and needs apple juice about 6 times a day. I bought Caden his own "baby" a few weeks after his announcement, and he held on pretty tight to his "baby" for all of a week.  He named it baby, then Thomas, and then Baby Thomas.  Baby Thomas now sits on the floor in his room, and occasionally gets the pleasure of sleeping in the bed with Caden if Caden remembers to ask for Baby Thomas.

The whole pregnancy thing hasn't really worried me, as much as entertained.  I occasionally give into impulse to humand or Caden's pregnancy and ask him about his baby.  As of 2 weeks ago he announced there are 2 babies growing inside of him.  I guess he's having twins.  "TWO babies?" I said.  Where are the babies growing in there?"  According to Caden one is in his boob and the other one is in his ear.  Who knew babies could be so versatile in their locations?

The only time I have been "concerned" as in might need to seek a professional play therapist for Caden is when I came downstairs and noticed he had hijacked my baby doppler ... had the earphones in his ears, and the doppler on his gutt.  There sat my 2 year old, doppler on his gutt, checking his baby.  I just took a picture on my phone and sent it to his Dad.  What else are you going to do at this point?  Caden recently told my perinatologist that he's pregnant.  The perinatologist sort of just looked at Caden with a confused look on his face.  I think the perinatologist was trying to figure out WHAT Caden had jsut said because surely it wasn't that he was pregnant and had a baby in his tummy ... two babies no less.  Caden repeated, "I got two babies in here," and pointed at his gutt.  The perinatologist looked at me and I said, "yeah, you heard him right, he's pregnant, it's twins, and better to jsut humor this situation than try and figure it out." 

You would think a perinatologist that deals with babies EVERY DAY would have humored the poor kid, but instead he just sort of looked at Caden, cocked his head to the side, and said, "huh, really?"  I guess that's why the perinatologsit never went into pediatrics ... no sense of humor.  Let's hope he finds some funny bone before this baby arrives.  I can only IMAGINE the one liners Caden will come up with when the actual baby is born.  He might as the doctor to go ahead and take his babies out now as well.