The "Illness", Franklin Emergency Room & I'm Still Alive ....

The latest illness at the Eldridge house has earned a name, “the illness.” The illness began with Drew … on Sunday evening … last week. He said he had a headache. We ignored him thinking he was trying to get out of school the next day. Monday morning he came in our room … early … and told us he was sick. We checked his temperature 104 degrees. Okay, so he wasn’t faking.

We spent Monday and Tuesday with “the sickness” sequestered nicely on the front couch doubling as Drew. There was hourly dosing of the Tylenol and the Motrin, etc. while “the illness” rendered Drew almost inept with a fever going no less than 102.5 degrees. Drew, through the voice of “the sickness” said, “mom, I like this couch, it molds to my body”. I didn’t have the heart to tell him it is because the couch is getting old, has seen many butts of various shapes and sizes, doubled as an Olympic gymnastics competition prop, and served as home base minus cushions (shields) for wars fighting for anything from turn to oreos. The sofa, the one that molded to his body, has sofa fatigue and we need a new one some day. For now, we keep this one and I told Drew, “honey, that’s because we bought the special “mold to your body” version.

Finally, it seemed the illness had left Drew late Tuesday evening. Wednesday morning he came bounding down the stairs, dressed and ready for school. He looked okay, so off to school he went. At about 9:30 in the school nurse called me and said, “Drew has a 101 degree temperature, can you come get him?” WHAT?!?! “The illness” had returned. So, I picked him up from school and within the hour we were back up to 103. I didn’t take him to the doctor, because ACCORDING to the school nurse, there is a NASTY virus haunting the area as of late. Apparently, it is a weird version of the flu, that is NOT defeated by the flu shot (so much for the annual flu shots!), but rather is a high fever that can last for up to a week. Yes, I know … awesome.

The germ-phobe in me, dedicated myself to fighting “the illness”. No way would this virus defeat me in my bleached, germ free zone. So, Thursday morning I scrubbed and I washed and I disinfected ALL of the house. All linens were washed, every sheet, comforter, blanket, towel, etc. If it wasn’t nailed down, it was bleached and boiled. Of course, Thursday, Drew seemed to be at the end of the illness, but the local television station announced “no school” Thursday or Friday because of the “threat”. (A kid, a computer, to much time on his hands, threats, FBI, and 2 days after the Virginia Tech massacre, you get the picture?)

Bradyn had not yet showed any signs of “the illness”as of Thursday, and Drew was camping out in the guest room, so no germ sharing. Friday morning, Drew didn’t have school, Bradyn did have preschool … but, alas, at 4 a.m. Friday morning Bradyn came into our bed with “the illness” in full force. Of course, his was accompanied by “the croup”. Uh-huh. So, we were off to the hot shower, outside for cold air to alleviate the croup, then there was the 103 temperature. That needed the Motrin/Tylenol fix.

We spent the rest of the weekend right into yesterday fighting “the illness” with Bradyn. Drew was better now, no problem. Jon seemed fine. I was fine … but oh wait, my eye had been bothering me all week. I was so busy with “the illness” I didn’t take time to address my eye issue, until about 4 p.m. Saturday night. I looked VERY closely at my eye and said, “shit”. Yep, that’s all I could muster.

In ten years I have had two “eye ulcers”, yes, ulcers. They manifest the same way, pain, a little swelling, and what looks like a little piece of cotton right on the colored part of your eye. They take about two months to heal completely. Think, open wound in the eye. If you WAIT before getting some sort of medical attention, you go blind. Simple. The last “eye ulcer” was 4 years ago. Of course, this was perfect timing for another.

So, I had to go to the local Franklin ER (which has a reputation of killing people who go in for a simple set of stitches … I am still alive). While there, I got sufficient medical attention, BUT I also had the privilege of sitting in the exam room by the “puker”. For the 2 hours I sat in my exam room, the “puker” did her thing … puked, repeatedly, And not just the puke it all out then you are done puke, oh no, this was the dry heave pukes, then moan and threaten to kill yourself and everyone in the hospital, pukes. It was, in a word, awesome.

Even more awesome than that was that a fellow franklinite and her boyfriend/son (not sure, the jury is still out on that one) came into the ER looking for “drugs”. If you wanted to categorize them medically … they were “drug seeking”. These characters feign deadly and fatal illnesses hoping for a “fix” from their local ER. Percocet, Oxcontin, anything will do. They just need a hit. The woman was feigning a headache or something, and the next thing you know they are getting all lippy with the staff of the ER and the ER attendant was threatening to call hospital security, etc...

Security was called, and the security guard came down to settle the dispute as only a hospital security guard armed with pepper spray and no real live gun can … he yelled at them and put them in an exam room, closed the door, and sat outside of their room until the Franklin PD arrived. I watched and/or heard most of this go down and thought how much I loved living in New Hampshire... Franklin esepcially. Never a dull moment.

But I am remiss, the eye ulcer was confirmed. The doctor numbed my eye with some drops, and THEN told me that the drops are very powerful and to make sure I don’t steal them when she leaves the room. (apparently this is a problem at the Franklin ER?). I guess the numbing drops are only to be used occasionally as they will melt my cornea. Yep, you guessed it, someone DID steal them once and ended up having to have a corneal transplant.

Right, got it, don’t get all sticky fingered at the Emergency Room and steal the eye drop drugs because my cornea was already beginning to melt, yet numb the pain, for now. She then put some other drops in, confirmed the familiar, “wow, that is really bad, it must be painful” diagnosis of the ulcer and then told me she didn’t have the prescription I would need there, but here was a script. Uh-huh. It was now 7:40 and I knew the local Rite Aid closed at 8. If I didn’t make it to the local Rite Aid, I would have to drive about 30 minutes to the “big city” with a numb and fully dilated eye. Something to look forward to!

The man nurse came to check me out of the exam room, while I was on the phone with Jon confirming the time the Rite Aid Pharmacy closed. In an attempt to put icing on my already humiliating, germ infested, gross out experience at the Franklin ER the man nurse says, “So, was that your husband on your cell?” I said, “yeah.” And the man nurse then proceeds to say, “Wow, your husband is a REALLY lucky man.” Uh-huh. All I could think was, “are you freaking kidding me, you are not hitting on me right now with my glasses on, my hair pulled up, and my sweat suit that makes me look like a 500 lb circus act on?” Apparently, the man nurse likes that sort of thing.

My eye hurt and my witticisms left me so I just said, “yep, he is.” and left that there. I RAN out of the ER, prescription in hand, passed the Franklin PD entering the ER (remember the lippy drug seekers?), and went straight to the Rite Aid. It was 7:57 and I begged the Pharmacist to fill my prescription. I think I looked a little “iffy” on the sane side so he complied. I went to check out. “That will be $63.00,” he says. I started laughing, looking at the 5 ml bottle of eye drops. “No seriously,“ I said, “we have insurance, really GOOD insurance, did you not apply it?” He wasn’t laughing when he said, “No, we applied it, that’s the price AFTER insurance.”

At this point, I knew I had been beaten. The illness, the cleaning escapades, the lack of real smelling ability because my sinus areas were burned with bleach. Waiting for me at home was my youngest with a 103 fever, and so I hung my head, squinted through my one good eye, handed over my visa, and said, “here.” What more could I do? I was beaten and apparently I had wrought some really bad karma on someone because it was ALL coming back this week.

I read my new $63 prescription instructions. (No, it was not in a golden container, though it should be) It was the end, the final passage of what sanity I had left. The wonderful instruction. Every hour, on the hour, one drop in the right eye. Yes, that means awake, in the night, every hour, for four days … at least.

THE NEXT DAY ...
I was referred to an eye doctor yesterday, in GILFORD (30 minutes away) and had to take both kids, (Bradyn is still sick, mind you) to the “wait in the office for 2 hours with all of the Medicaid old people patients”. Finally I was in the actual doctor’s chair, trying in vain to decipher what he was saying (he was Indian, and English is not his first language) to me, and vaguely recognized the words “blind and bad”. Uh-huh. I wasn’t blind, but apparently, I was close. Still on the drops, and back to ANOTHER eye doctor on Thursday morning because the Indian guy will be on vacation or something so I have to see his colleage, which is in LACONIA (another 40 minute drive). Again … awesome.

ALL OF THIS and wouldn’t you know it? The complaining I have been doing about the snow storms in April, waiting in vain for Spring … all last weekend was beautiful. In fact, it was 80 degrees on Monday. Yet, the corneal ulcer and the numbing corneal melting eye drops with some dilation drops and antibacterial drops blinded to the suns warm rays. Driving in the beautiful weather is really nice … except for when every 4 hours I have to use drops (along with the every hour drops) to dilate my eye. So, I drive, with one eye wincing in pain as my corneas are melting, and try to stay on the road. S

O, where does that leave me now. Well, Bradyn seems to have turned the corner with “the illness”, still a bit croupy, but alive. I am wearing my super hot make me a babe forevermore glasses (for an undetermined amount of time, which makes the vanity in me scream for mercy), my eye is throbbing, that’s about it.

Do you see where I am going with all of this? My sanity right now is definitely questionable. I have taught 2 of my four aerobics classes this week. I didn’t fall off of my step last night, so that was a plus. I was convinced with the “eye” I wouldn’t be able to judge distance even with my glasses on. So now, I sweat, (gross) and have to take the glasses off and wipe them off. UGH! Just one more thing in the land of my life. But, other than that we are doing GREAT! Bradyn has officially kicked “the illness’s” butt, taking no prisoners. Kids are on spring break all week, AND my poor bulbs DID survive the last three April noreasters (snow storms) and I saw signs of life in a little yellow daffodil yesterday. In all things I suppose it is important to not only see the humor in life, but also God’s little miracles. Okay, eyes bobbing back and forth and time for more drops.